I Want to Do Everything and Be Everything

 Growing up, I've always been a creative soul.

As I got older, I collected more hobbies and passions. I would sign out hobby and craft books from my local library and try every project that caught my eye, always eager to see what I could make or learn next. But as the years went on, I started running into a problem: there was only so much physical space, and even less time to delegate to all of the things I wanted to explore.

At one point, I was lucky enough to be given an entire craft room in my home; which I'm extremely grateful for and know this is not a realistic experience for everyone; but having my own creative space where I could go and lock myself away for hours just creating whatever I wanted has honestly made me who I am today.

As I got even older, more homework, working part-time jobs, more studies, and having other commitments, I realized more clearly how many hours were really in a day, and that if I wanted to continue with certain practices, I'd have to delegate each hour of my time very strategically.

I want to do everything. 

I want to be a graphic designer, a marketer, a social media manager, an influencer, a painter, a muralist, a blogger, an author, a video editor, a banner painter, an entrepreneur, just anything and everything creative.

As I continue to find the design job that is right for me post grad, I am asking myself, why do I need to choose one creative identity? 

The funny thing is, the more I think about all the things I want to do, the more I realize they aren't really separate.

My love for graphic design feeds into my love for illustration, and illustration feeds into painting, into mural art. My interest in social media requires marketing, which makes me want to learn more about photography and video to improve my practice. Writing a blog makes me want to write something longer, have it published, and share my writing with the world. Making things for myself makes me want to make things for other people. If I'm good enough at making these things for other people, could I start a business venture from it?

One interest seems to open the door to another. 

For a long time, I thought that meant I needed to pick one. Pick a career. Pick a title. Pick the thing I'm "good at" and stick with it —But I'm starting to wonder if that's actually necessary.

Maybe I don't need to choose between being a graphic designer and being a painter. Maybe I can be a designer who paints. Maybe I can be a designer who writes, makes videos, runs a business, creates content, and occasionally decides she wants to paint a giant wall. Do I just call myself a creative and rhyme off my laundry list of interests and professional practices whenever someone asks what I do?

Don't get me wrong, I do want to be a graphic designer. But the more I think about how often graphic design ties into marketing, media, and content creation, the more I wonder if one title can really encompass everything I want to do. When someone hears my name, I don't want them to think only graphic designer, marketer, or social media specialist. I want them to think of my creativity, my love for diving into intricate, introspective topics, my art, and so much more.

I don't think I want one perfectly defined creative identity. I want the freedom to let my interests change, grow, overlap, and occasionally lead me somewhere I didn't expect. I want the freedom as a creative to be recognized for more than just one practice or passion.

Maybe the goal isn't to figure out which one I want to be.

Maybe it's figuring out how to make room for all of them when the room is limited, and ultimately getting smaller over time.

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